Mental Health thread

SurfFuerteventura

Rabbitt Bartholomew status
Sep 20, 2014
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Yesterday while walking the dogs in the morning, "I wouldn't blame you if you were to leave me for a younger, happier woman who loves to surf as much as you do".

:foreheadslap:

"For better or for worse, until death do us part, you didn't leave me when I went crazy for 4 years suffering the pain and misery of 3 fractured vertebrae in my back, or when I lost it after the Madrid train bombings... on the contrary, you stood by me, and saw me through my tough time. What kind of man do you think I am, that at the first sign of trouble I'm going to turn tail and run? There are happier days ahead, irregardless of whether you can conceive of them or not now. Hang tough honey, and maybe don't make any life long decisions while your head is in a bad place".


Didn't know what else to say.


Not sure I like the direction she seems to be favoring right now.


How do you help someone like this, in such a dark place, to see the light?

Praying for happier days.


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Eyyyyyy!
 

Chocki

Phil Edwards status
Feb 18, 2007
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Yesterday while walking the dogs in the morning, "I wouldn't blame you if you were to leave me for a younger, happier woman who loves to surf as much as you do".

:foreheadslap:

"For better or for worse, until death do us part, you didn't leave me when I went crazy for 4 years suffering the pain and misery of 3 fractured vertebrae in my back, or when I lost it after the Madrid train bombings... on the contrary, you stood by me, and saw me through my tough time. What kind of man do you think I am, that at the first sign of trouble I'm going to turn tail and run? There are happier days ahead, irregardless of whether you can conceive of them or not now. Hang tough honey, and maybe don't make any life long decisions while your head is in a bad place".


Didn't know what else to say.


Not sure I like the direction she seems to be favoring right now.


How do you help someone like this, in such a dark place, to see the light?

Praying for happier days.


View attachment 140924


Eyyyyyy!
You handled that as well as you could IMO. My only advice would be to try/continue to include her in your leisure activities more? And/or maybe forgo a surf or two for rn in lieu of spending qual time with her.

Also big fan of the Fonz growing up but especially the Tuscaderos. And is it just me or is he pretty creepy in hindsight what with the whole being this way older dude who lives over the Cunningham’s garage and hangs out w/ the HS kids and bangs underage? chicks. Hes like the proto Wooderson

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santacruzin

Kelly Slater status
Oct 17, 2007
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Dude heavy sh!t 9'4. Keep on being there but dont forget to take care of yourself.

Currently dealing with a lot myself. My dad had been having some issues lately, turns out he had an undiagnosed stroke a year ago and now they think he may also have early onset dementia/alzheimers.
Dont know all the details yet.

Going to be a long heavy road ahead, hope I can deal but even more worried for my mom. Getting older can suck sometimes
 
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SurfFuerteventura

Rabbitt Bartholomew status
Sep 20, 2014
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Got her to smile a bit yesterday, after taking her to her favorite beach and then out to lunch... of course, as soon as I returned, my mom had "finger painted" the bathroom and some of the walls in her bedroom with poo.

Cannot win I tell ya.

:foreheadslap::toilet:

Good run of swell coming this week at least.

:bowdown:
 

Chocki

Phil Edwards status
Feb 18, 2007
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Got her to smile a bit yesterday, after taking her to her favorite beach and then out to lunch... of course, as soon as I returned, my mom had "finger painted" the bathroom and some of the walls in her bedroom with poo.

Cannot win I tell ya.

:foreheadslap::toilet:

Good run of swell coming this week at least.

:bowdown:
Youre a fucking saint for what your doing for Mom, mine did the same thing only it was confined the John lol
 
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casa_mugrienta

Duke status
Apr 13, 2008
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Got her to smile a bit yesterday, after taking her to her favorite beach and then out to lunch... of course, as soon as I returned, my mom had "finger painted" the bathroom and some of the walls in her bedroom with poo.

Cannot win I tell ya.

:foreheadslap::toilet:

Good run of swell coming this week at least.

:bowdown:
It's Ashley Bickerton, channeling you with an art prank, via your mother.

I do not work well with emotional blackmailing. Just doesn't seem to work on me for some reason. And saying something like that is 100% that as far as I'm concerned.
Me neither.

TBH I probably would've reacted the same way.

Emotional blackmail is a manipulation tactic women like to employ.

I had to learn from watching others get played by it (my dad). So I'm instantly cautious.

My mom tries it on me nowadays, I tell her casually knock it off and I don't want to hear her crap. She usually breaks down in tears, and I just laugh. :roflmao:

But on the other hand this usually happens when things aren't going the way she wants.

Doesn't sound like that's the case for your wife, more like she's depressed.

Since some time has now passed, I'd bring the suicide talk up to her gentle curious way by asking her what she was feeling at the time and if it's something she thinks about on the regular.
 

SurfFuerteventura

Rabbitt Bartholomew status
Sep 20, 2014
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Man when it rains it fcking pours. But I appreciate you all sharing some of your experiences for perspective and to learn from some of your experiences.
That's why they get shared.

Youre a fucking saint for what your doing for Mom, mine did the same thing only it was confined the John lol
Tell that to my siblings who act as if she'd died when she moved here.


Serious mental health check up coming in .....


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Eeeeyyy!
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:roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:
 
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npsp

Miki Dora status
Dec 30, 2003
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Was a bit of a rough weekend.... We are helping my best friend who passed away last X-mas eve, family settle the estate. This involves selling the house and cleaning out the garage. Going thru the garage, sorting tools, gear, deciding which dirt bikes to sell vs keep and uncovering memories from good and bad times times spent in the past was not easy. Made worse by the other good friends that are still not handling the loss well.
I feel for the kids. They lost their mom when they were very young and now their dad when they are young adults. All they have is their 92 YO grandpa and a 60 YO auntie that has never had kids and has no idea of how to handle any of this.... A lot of the work is falling on my wife's and my shoulders and it is taxing. We're up for it though as my friend would have done the same for us and he was there for us a couple of years back when we suffered a horrible tragedy.
For those of you with family and that have any semblance of an estate, get a trust and put all assets in the trust. WTF with having a trust if you don't put any assets in it????? Do not make your family go thru probate hell. Fooking guy!!! If he was here I'd slap him!
 

Chocki

Phil Edwards status
Feb 18, 2007
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SurfFuerteventura

Rabbitt Bartholomew status
Sep 20, 2014
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Who said when it rains, it pours?

Just dropped my wife at the ER in a full on panic attack. They gave her some alprazolam, did some blood work and called the on call psychiatrist.

All this was set off by my mom saying I had put some panties that were my wifes in her clean laundry. My wife immediately accused me of having my "lover" over when she wasn't home.

I explained that the most obvious explanation was the most probable. My mother forgot those are her panties. Besides, if I WERE to take a lover, I GUARANTEE she's not going to be wearing underwear my 88 yo mother would fit into. Bottom line, they came from her hamper, they are hers, she's old and forgot.

Full on jaw lock, hyper ventilating, shaking like a leaf on a tree during a hurricane. I didn't know what to do... took her to the ER.

Pouring down hard right now, despite the sunny skies and good surf.

:toilet:

Almost forgot, caught some really nice waves this am, DOH drops. Met a shaper from Encinitas in the parking area after, Craig Hollingsworth. Really nice guy!

:bowdown::waving::shaka:
 
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Subway

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Dec 31, 2008
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damn brother. Hard to keep your head when all those about you are losing (lost) theirs

Even if you do have a granny-panty fetish, I'm still pulling for you and your family
 
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Waterlogged05

Michael Peterson status
May 14, 2005
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How do you break out of a dry streak? Been trying to surf but my car troubles have been remedied finally. Then missed swell because... "chores and stuff"

Need to just go even if it sucks.
 

Waterlogged05

Michael Peterson status
May 14, 2005
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Damn
SurfFuerteventura

that's rough!

My gf has been really on edge recently and snapping at small things and I haven't been the most available since I've been slammed w work and school. Hard to take care of her and my sh!t. Can't imagine doing this with kids : (
 

Senor Sopa

Billy Hamilton status
Mar 11, 2015
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Almost forgot, caught some really nice waves this am, DOH drops. Met a shaper from Encinitas in the parking area after, Craig Hollingsworth. Really nice guy!

:bowdown::waving::shaka:
Argh, wives. They are the best AND the worst.
If you see him again, ask him about the Simon Anderson thruster story
 
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santacruzin

Kelly Slater status
Oct 17, 2007
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valley purgatory
In SB for a week. Hit up rincon mountain winery Saturday for a tasting/pick up event
the brewery they also run had some of the best beer I have had.
Moscow mule lager , sounds weird but it was delicious.Talked to the Brewer and you could tell he loves his craft.
looks like I will have to join the beer club as it seems to be the only way to get the stuff other than finding it on tap.