Mental Health thread

Why_was_I_banned

Billy Hamilton status
Sep 5, 2020
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Yeah, the grief/pain/anger needs to be faced for certain....and even when you deal with it, it can come back, but hopefully a little less.

That said, a little numbness can help buy some breathing room or at least make it feel like you aren't drinking from a firehose in the moment.

I mean, that is why booze is served at wakes......I would have been a wreck at the wake after I scattered Friend #1 ashes in the surf. When I had to talk with his parents at the wake, the last thing* his folks needed was their son's better friends blubbering while they thanked me (with tears in their eyes and quavering voice) for everything I had done. Those two pints had just enough numbing power to dull my higher emotional functions to let them express their (greater) grief without having to also cope with mine.


* - Please note that this is my interpretation of their needs.
I lost my best friend about 10 years ago now. Addison' s disease. I was half numb, but more just stunned. I couldn't speak, which is really weird for me, ya know? I just felt so empty. Really lost.

I was watching his other friends who were able to speak at his service. I don't know how they did it. His widow was really strong. So sure they would see him in heaven.
 

stringcheese

Michael Peterson status
Jun 21, 2017
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I work(ed)/am(was)financially entangled in a restaurant and I straight up walked out of my job Saturday morning. I just....couldn't take it anymore. Didn't care how bad the timing was, it was time. We parted ways then and there. Paperwork will take care of the rest.
It's Thursday and I already have two new jobs....
I wanted a vacation.
I want to move somewhere with warmer water and better waves. That's it, really.
Money money money money. Money. (Sung like the Vegas song)
 

plasticbertrand

Miki Dora status
Jan 12, 2009
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I wanted a vacation.
^current mood^

I'm seriously planning to check out, buy a sailboat in the Med and bug out. At 57, the time is running out to do these sort of things.

I made sure to tell this to as many people as possible so I can't chicken out.

If I'm still here next year, you can all make fun of me. :(
 
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Subway

Rabbitt Bartholomew status
Dec 31, 2008
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LBNY
Dude I’m only 41 and I’ve been running numbers and long term financial models for the exact same purpose lol :drowning:
 

stringcheese

Michael Peterson status
Jun 21, 2017
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^current mood^

I'm seriously planning to check out, buy a sailboat in the Med and bug out. At 57, the time is running out to do these sort of things.

I made sure to tell this to as many people as possible so I can't chicken out.

If I'm still here next year, you can all make fun of me. :(

Wrote a note, said "be back in a minute"
Bought a boat, and I sailed off in it.

Don't think anybodys gonna miss me anyway...
 
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PRCD

Miki Dora status
Feb 25, 2020
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Dude I’m only 41 and I’ve been running numbers and long term financial models for the exact same purpose lol :drowning:
we all are. Realistically, I think the days of working for someone else are over. There seems to be a big reset going on. It's hard to get stuff from Asia to re-sell. Big corps are paranoid of COVID-related liability so you can't go into the office. Yet small businesses are being clobbered by these restrictions right now. Economic activity seems to be down by at least a third out here.

If you're going to make a physical product, you seem to need to be able to do it fully-automated with as few employees as possible. A service product is much easier - including SaaS, but people have had it up to here with services I think.

It'll be interesting to see how all this washes out into commercial real-estate prices.
Wrote a note, said "be back in a minute"
Bought a boat, and I sailed off in it.

Don't think anybodys gonna miss me anyway...
Someone was telling me Florida was the best place to buy a big sailboat. NYers buy one in NY thinking they're going to retire and live a pirate's life in the Caribbean sailng. By the time they make it to FL in the inter-coastal waterway, they're over it and sell it.
 

Subway

Rabbitt Bartholomew status
Dec 31, 2008
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Well, the old adage says a great sales person will never lack for opportunity, but whatever sales gifts i have are enthusiasm based, and enthusiasm is hard to drum up these days. I'm closing deals but it’s still a small fraction of the good old days. Emojis and a high energy, low pressure method can only go so far in 2020
 

Why_was_I_banned

Billy Hamilton status
Sep 5, 2020
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Well, the old adage says a great sales person will never lack for opportunity, but whatever sales gifts i have are enthusiasm based, and enthusiasm is hard to drum up these days. I'm closing deals but it’s still a small fraction of the good old days. Emojis and a high energy, low pressure method can only go so far in 2020
In my limited sales experience, the product sells itself, as long as the customer likes you.

Subway, you seem to have the likeable part down. Find a good product you believe in. It will all be o.k.
 

Kento

Duke status
Jan 11, 2002
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The Bar
I work(ed)/am(was)financially entangled in a restaurant and I straight up walked out of my job Saturday morning. I just....couldn't take it anymore. Didn't care how bad the timing was, it was time. We parted ways then and there. Paperwork will take care of the rest.
It's Thursday and I already have two new jobs....
I wanted a vacation.
I want to move somewhere with warmer water and better waves. That's it, really.
Money money money money. Money. (Sung like the Vegas song)
If I am not mistaken, you are relatively young. So long as you have a little financial security, don't be afraid to take a mental health break from work. Enjoy life, recharge batteries, surf and surf a lot. Like I said, don't take this too far where you're living in a cardboard box. Sometimes I have changed jobs just to have a couple weeks of obligation-less, stress-free vacation in between. I got crushed with the financial crash in 2008-2009. Blew through a ton of my savings but that 16 months or so was one of the best eras of my life. Partied and surfed like crazy, got both to a pretty high level too.

But seriously, just that mental rejuvenation where you are living just for yourself will cleanse your soul.

Good luck to you.
 

Autoprax

Duke status
Jan 24, 2011
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Vagina Point
I'm 59. Expenses always rise to meet income.

We are all doomed
You are supposed to lighten your load as you get older.

Cast off what you don't need.

Sell the SB house and buy a yurt in Nor Cal.

I think the pandemic has everyone disregulated.

Wait until it's over before you make the big life change.
 

Why_was_I_banned

Billy Hamilton status
Sep 5, 2020
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You are supposed to lighten your load as you get older.

Cast off what you don't need.

Sell the SB house and buy a yurt in Nor Cal.

I think the pandemic has everyone disregulated.

Wait until it's over before you make the big life change.
That's the plan, but the house in s.b. is an oasis in the pandemic. Just not yet
 

Subway

Rabbitt Bartholomew status
Dec 31, 2008
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In my limited sales experience, the product sells itself, as long as the customer likes you.

Subway, you seem to have the likeable part down. Find a good product you believe in. It will all be o.k.
Totally. First ten rules of sales are have something great to sell
 
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CutnSnip

Michael Peterson status
Sep 11, 2018
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Probably dropping in on you, California
I got crushed with the financial crash in 2008-2009. Blew through a ton of my savings but that 16 months or so was one of the best eras of my life. Partied and surfed like crazy, got both to a pretty high level too.
I finally started to ease into not owrking and enjoying it, and then work came along, but the last month before was bliss. no stress, no money coming in but no anxiety for whatever reason about it either.. been off this week for the first time in 2 1/2 months and it felt amazing, ezcpet ive now dinged two boards in two days with my own body parts.. ive surfed everyday and now that inquiries are starting to coming in for next week im feeling that stress an d anxiety creep back in...Yesterday before calls started coming i was planning out a budget so I didnt have to work till next year and was so excited but theres a piece of my brain (the jewish one) that wont let me turn down work.
 

SurfFuerteventura

Miki Dora status
Sep 20, 2014
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hulling, mostly...
1999 few months before the "millennium glitch" was going to end it all and send us run ning back to the caves. (Remember that reset?).

Coming off a twelve month disability to try an experimental treatment for hep C which didn't work, but bought me precious time.

Dr. heading the study sat me down to give me the lowdown on my viral load, etc...

I asked her what to do now that my viral count was very low, but not yet cured status range.

She says the way I see it you have 2 options,

1-) return to work at the bank, I will see you within 3-5 years for liver transplant, unless of course we find a cure first.

2-) don't return to work, design a life for yourself with MUCH LESS STRESS, or at least stress you can actually do something to remediate. And get on with your life.

I chose B. Sold everything, cashed in the retirement plan, drove the 1974 240Z cross country, garaged it at my brother's house. Hoped a plane to the high central plains of Spain, and after 5 years kicking around there, bought a chunk of land in the Canary Islands just before the currency flipped to euros. Waited 6 months, used the instant equity garnered from the price increase that the currency change broughton to everything, used said instant equity to build our live happily forever after home.

Best advice I ever received,

1-). DO IT!! Or you WILL regret it.

2-) NEVER LOOK BACK AND TRY TO SEE WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN TAKING THE OTHER PATH.

Best of luck hopping off the merry-go-round, that's the first and hardest step to take.

DP over here, Epsilon is pulling away and leaving wonderful conditions!!!
 

$kully

Duke status
Feb 27, 2009
47,936
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I’m in a bad place right now. Been a complete and total asshole to my girlfriend, almost fought one of my best friends today. Been doing my best to fight off depression for the first time in my 43yrs and feel like I’m losing. But then again this is all new to me so I don’t know how bad it can really get. My only salvation these days is exercise. Bike rides, surfing and long walks with my dog. Walked 12 miles today. I’ve always had a temper but it’s never been this out of my control and frankly it’s scaring me. Think I’m gonna seek some help but from everything I’m hearing, therapists are in high demand these days and you’re lucky if you can get an appointment. May start microdosing psylocibin if I can secure a good quantity.
 
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Why_was_I_banned

Billy Hamilton status
Sep 5, 2020
1,388
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I’m in a bad place right now. Been a complete and total asshole to my girlfriend, almost fought one of my best friends today. Been doing my best to fight off depression for the first time in my 43yrs and feel like I’m losing. But then again this is all new to me so I don’t know how bad it can really get. My only salvation these days is exercise. Bike rides, surfing and long walks with my dog. Walked 12 miles today. I’ve always had a temper but it’s never been this out of my control and frankly it’s scaring me. Think I’m gonna seek some help but from everything I’m hearing, therapists are in high demand these days and you’re lucky if you can get an appointment. May start microdosing psylocibin if I can secure a good quantity.
I don't know anything about mushrooms, but if u are smoking weed, stop now.

I grew up with a friend, who would get paranoid and agitated, and not just when he was high, but for a while afterwards.

You could tell when he wasn't smoking , because the old Bob was back. But when he was, he wasn't safe to be around. He went so far as to get an " assault on a peace officer " conviction.

I finally had to cut him out, because he wasn't safe to be around.