26 or 27 & best shape of my life training Muay Thai regularly. Rarely drink at this point. Decide to go out dancing with an *acquaintance* and a couple girls. I had two drinks over like 4 hours or something. Danced until my shirt was literally soaking through and making her back wet lmao. It’s relevant...
So we’re walking down Garnet st in PB at 2 am (start of every fight story?) and dudes are all walking with their arms wide out chest puffed, it’s so funny to me. This big chick bumps shoulders super hard to the chick I was dancing with and my chick turns and says something like “bitch” or whatever, basically calls her out. Chick storms over and is about to drop my chick so I stand in between and just hold them both back.
One of my rules is I’m not gonna watch someone get killed, and if you know anything about street fights you know it isn’t just trading blows, ‘we scrap brah,’ any one shot could be lethal and it’s not something to fuck with.
So I’m in between em holding each other back all’s well, surprisingly neither is swinging on me. All of a sudden this dude is like hugging me. I’m like, what? I look down and it’s the little Mexican dude with his boy right behind him and I’m just confused. I process real quick and go “oh, I’m not fighting it’s them...” as I look left and right. Somehow both of the chicks had slipped away and as my neck comes to center there’s just a fist straight to my dome from the second dude. I’m instantly on the ground with hugging guy on top of me.
Lesson #1: if they’re touching you, them AND THEIR FRIENDS are knocked out. Ask questions later.
While getting kicked in the face a couple times I start to come to and realize that the dude wasn’t hugging me - he was trying to tackle me and he was just plastered and also tiny.
So I come to after seeing stars and throw in a little mma technique I learned from the literally one MMA class I took when I studied jiu jitsu at 16 years old... which is to lay on your side on your elbow and use your upper leg to keep someone away with push kicks. So I grab this fuckers head and grind it into the concrete under my full weight while I pivot towards the dude kicking me and push kick to his chest to keep him away. Works great, I get three push kicks in as he keeps advancing then getting pushed away.
Lesson 2: don’t use jiu jitsu in a street fight. Get up and run away.
After the third kick about 5 of his friends come up from behind and all start kicking me. I’m just getting destroyed. I make it up once, after 30-45 seconds or more, and get taken down immediately by all of them. It’s too many. I learn to cover up different ways to better defend. It reminds me of being tossed around by a big wave. I think of my *acquaintance*, formerly “friend,” and don’t even bother calling for his help. Maybe I did once. Another thing I’ve learned is you can’t count on your friends in physical conflicts. You just can’t. It isn’t their fault, just human nature to freeze up and be scared. Most people can’t function in these kinds of tense situations. Hundreds of people watching on garnet didn’t do anything. It’s just people.
So I’m down for the second time, another minute plus. Somehow make it up and get put in a choke hold. I wiggle my way free, which was hard. It shouldn’t have been, there’s nothing hard about getting out of a choke hold when their legs aren’t wrapped around you. But I have to emphasize after 3-4? Hours of dancing and getting beat on for 2 minutes I literally was just so exhausted. I get free and have this idea to say “CHILL BRO CHILL!” Or something to trigger the “back off” response in their heads. Like, I’m one of you or something, idk. They all back off and I stumble into the middle of garnet. Missing a shoe, shirt ripped, covered in lumps and blood. Knees, elbows, shoulders, face. I barely stagger away and “run” for my life, which is really a very very slow jog. Walking pace. Down the alley towards Grand.
I’ll post the rest in a sec
So we’re walking down Garnet st in PB at 2 am (start of every fight story?) and dudes are all walking with their arms wide out chest puffed, it’s so funny to me. This big chick bumps shoulders super hard to the chick I was dancing with and my chick turns and says something like “bitch” or whatever, basically calls her out. Chick storms over and is about to drop my chick so I stand in between and just hold them both back.
One of my rules is I’m not gonna watch someone get killed, and if you know anything about street fights you know it isn’t just trading blows, ‘we scrap brah,’ any one shot could be lethal and it’s not something to fuck with.
So I’m in between em holding each other back all’s well, surprisingly neither is swinging on me. All of a sudden this dude is like hugging me. I’m like, what? I look down and it’s the little Mexican dude with his boy right behind him and I’m just confused. I process real quick and go “oh, I’m not fighting it’s them...” as I look left and right. Somehow both of the chicks had slipped away and as my neck comes to center there’s just a fist straight to my dome from the second dude. I’m instantly on the ground with hugging guy on top of me.
Lesson #1: if they’re touching you, them AND THEIR FRIENDS are knocked out. Ask questions later.
While getting kicked in the face a couple times I start to come to and realize that the dude wasn’t hugging me - he was trying to tackle me and he was just plastered and also tiny.
So I come to after seeing stars and throw in a little mma technique I learned from the literally one MMA class I took when I studied jiu jitsu at 16 years old... which is to lay on your side on your elbow and use your upper leg to keep someone away with push kicks. So I grab this fuckers head and grind it into the concrete under my full weight while I pivot towards the dude kicking me and push kick to his chest to keep him away. Works great, I get three push kicks in as he keeps advancing then getting pushed away.
Lesson 2: don’t use jiu jitsu in a street fight. Get up and run away.
After the third kick about 5 of his friends come up from behind and all start kicking me. I’m just getting destroyed. I make it up once, after 30-45 seconds or more, and get taken down immediately by all of them. It’s too many. I learn to cover up different ways to better defend. It reminds me of being tossed around by a big wave. I think of my *acquaintance*, formerly “friend,” and don’t even bother calling for his help. Maybe I did once. Another thing I’ve learned is you can’t count on your friends in physical conflicts. You just can’t. It isn’t their fault, just human nature to freeze up and be scared. Most people can’t function in these kinds of tense situations. Hundreds of people watching on garnet didn’t do anything. It’s just people.
So I’m down for the second time, another minute plus. Somehow make it up and get put in a choke hold. I wiggle my way free, which was hard. It shouldn’t have been, there’s nothing hard about getting out of a choke hold when their legs aren’t wrapped around you. But I have to emphasize after 3-4? Hours of dancing and getting beat on for 2 minutes I literally was just so exhausted. I get free and have this idea to say “CHILL BRO CHILL!” Or something to trigger the “back off” response in their heads. Like, I’m one of you or something, idk. They all back off and I stumble into the middle of garnet. Missing a shoe, shirt ripped, covered in lumps and blood. Knees, elbows, shoulders, face. I barely stagger away and “run” for my life, which is really a very very slow jog. Walking pace. Down the alley towards Grand.
I’ll post the rest in a sec