STFU and Take that sh!t to the political forum.
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Youth activities
- Thread starter Bob Dobbalina
- Start date
Surfed a good spot with my son last year in your area.
I won't say where, but it was a spot I wouldn't have expected to have waves.
One of my fondest memories with my son is our sharing waves. He would jump off his potato chip and jump on my log while trying to push me off the board. He usually won! Good grades/citizenship in HS and college earned him a portion of my overly abundant frequent flier miles. He made many new friends in the waters around Australia, Peru, Costa Rica, Panama, Europe, South Africa, Tonga, Mauritius, La Reunion, Israel, etc. Some of his ‘new’ friends ended up in our spare bedrooms during their surfing safari’s to the colonies. Great ‘kids’ who we would welcome back any time.
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One thing I am very happy about is both my kids love skiing.
Kudos to all of us parents trying their best to instill positive traits in their kids through a variety of means
I think team sports and being held accountable by a coach does wonders for most kids. Teamwork is learned and more importantly discipline, dedication and the feeling of accomplishment when successful is great for their confidence. They see hard work pays off. I had coaches when I grew up that would tear us down and build us up - it worked for me - not sure you can get away with doing that these days.
My daughter played soccer as a kid (was terrible but never gave up) and swam competitively. She routinely won in big meets in multiple strokes. I never pressed her or pushed her into anything as my Dad never did that to me and my kin - have 3 siblings who were D-1 athletes. I just signed her up , watched and said good job.
Not a lot team sport opportunities here for her but the weird thing is she got freakishly good at surfing then abruptly quit at 15 and hasn't surfed in about two years - "IDIOT - you live in INDO!" Never said that but never understand why she quit, but never pushed her to start up agan. The local groms were stoked when she gave her quiver away.
Kids dont listen to us parents much, but they will listen to coaches and if the coach is good he/she can do wonders for your kid.
Glory Dad days - these pics was when she was around 14 - since this is a surfing forum
I think team sports and being held accountable by a coach does wonders for most kids. Teamwork is learned and more importantly discipline, dedication and the feeling of accomplishment when successful is great for their confidence. They see hard work pays off. I had coaches when I grew up that would tear us down and build us up - it worked for me - not sure you can get away with doing that these days.
My daughter played soccer as a kid (was terrible but never gave up) and swam competitively. She routinely won in big meets in multiple strokes. I never pressed her or pushed her into anything as my Dad never did that to me and my kin - have 3 siblings who were D-1 athletes. I just signed her up , watched and said good job.
Not a lot team sport opportunities here for her but the weird thing is she got freakishly good at surfing then abruptly quit at 15 and hasn't surfed in about two years - "IDIOT - you live in INDO!" Never said that but never understand why she quit, but never pushed her to start up agan. The local groms were stoked when she gave her quiver away.
Kids dont listen to us parents much, but they will listen to coaches and if the coach is good he/she can do wonders for your kid.
Glory Dad days - these pics was when she was around 14 - since this is a surfing forum
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honestly i think people with insane talent and next level intelligence their brains just function differently - her moms dna not mine
she literally told me on a good day at nias - dad surfing is your deal not mine and that was it
finished
she has had a tough life and being raised by just me i think she is just searching for her own identity -- been a heavy and dark road for her w mom bailing on her -
try to keep a stable and consistent life for her and waiting to see what indo uni she goes to
parenting is next level
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Every kid is different. All three of mine were in the surf from the time they could walk. One of my three was all about team sports. Even as a toddler, he didn't watch cartoons.....he watched SportsCenter. Baseball, hockey, football, soccer, basketball. then on to high school and college golf. That one is now working on a professional golf career and still surfs and foils in his free time and is a professional sports junkie. The other two never embraced team sports and only wanted to surf.
Thanks everyone. There's lots to digest here and I'm still chewing.
With my daughter, the split household makes it tough since mom is an hour away. Her mom just signed her up for karate. Something I'm indifferent about. I hope she gets enthusiastic and gains some confidence, but I just don't hold a lot of understanding of the relevance. THhre are other martial arts that I think have more merit, but I'm pretty ignorant to it all. She can be a bit of a perfectionist at this point (Easily frustrated, wants to start things over or quit if they don't meet expectation, melt down when it's not right). For now, Swim is important. She likes the water, but I need her to get stronger so I can feel more confidence with her out there. Currently, she's still a liability.
I'm thinking that music could be difficult, but that doesn't mean I'm ruling it out. We'll see if activities that push that button ultimately build perseverance or if they make her quit before the growth shows. Delayed gratification is a MFer for kids.
We have a pretty non existent circle of kid-having friends here, so it feels like we're on our own all the time. I'm not excited about having to be friends with other soccer/dance/bjj dads & moms, but it would be nice sometimes to have people to support the kids and us.
With my daughter, the split household makes it tough since mom is an hour away. Her mom just signed her up for karate. Something I'm indifferent about. I hope she gets enthusiastic and gains some confidence, but I just don't hold a lot of understanding of the relevance. THhre are other martial arts that I think have more merit, but I'm pretty ignorant to it all. She can be a bit of a perfectionist at this point (Easily frustrated, wants to start things over or quit if they don't meet expectation, melt down when it's not right). For now, Swim is important. She likes the water, but I need her to get stronger so I can feel more confidence with her out there. Currently, she's still a liability.
I'm thinking that music could be difficult, but that doesn't mean I'm ruling it out. We'll see if activities that push that button ultimately build perseverance or if they make her quit before the growth shows. Delayed gratification is a MFer for kids.
We have a pretty non existent circle of kid-having friends here, so it feels like we're on our own all the time. I'm not excited about having to be friends with other soccer/dance/bjj dads & moms, but it would be nice sometimes to have people to support the kids and us.
Thanks everyone. THere's lots to digest here and I'm still chewing. The "let's look at our options, make choices, and ride it out" concept seems solid at this point.
With my daughter, the split household makes it tough since mom's is an hour away. Her mom just signed her up for karate. Something I'm indifferent about. I hope she gets enthusiastic and gains some confidence. She can be a bit of a perfectionist at this point (Easily frustrated, wants to start things over or quit if they don't meet expectation, melt down when it's not right). We'll see if activities that push that button ultimately build perseverance or if they make her quit prematurely.
With my daughter, the split household makes it tough since mom's is an hour away. Her mom just signed her up for karate. Something I'm indifferent about. I hope she gets enthusiastic and gains some confidence. She can be a bit of a perfectionist at this point (Easily frustrated, wants to start things over or quit if they don't meet expectation, melt down when it's not right). We'll see if activities that push that button ultimately build perseverance or if they make her quit prematurely.
At 15 it is developmental.
Dad= closely related to surfing.
Developmental need to break away from parent(s).
This separation is needed to develop into a healthy adulthood.
OK.
She was shredding- I thought those feels alone (high competence, connection with nature) may have carried her through.
She was shredding- I thought those feels alone (high competence, connection with nature) may have carried her through.
Being a kid is different these days I think.
There is the thing in the USA where your child has to be involved in a much organized stuff as possible, both recreationally and academically.
I've watched this play out with my sister in law...I don't know if it's more exhausting for the parents or the kids.
It's always go go go.
Flip side I know a family where the policy is the kid participates in one organized activity and the rest of the time is free to develop his own interests (no TV/tablet/video games though). Seems to be a rarity.
I have friends that are always taking their kids to activities. They have no life. They exist to drive their kids to karate, soccer, piano lessons, dance lessons. Kids are exhausted. Parents are exhausted. Too tired to be a couple. Too tired to fuck.
I had a whole lot of unconstructed free time growing up. I do not see much of this now-a-days. I don't know what this means, but I expect it will result in more people who grow to adults and haven't:
1. Built a dam on the local creek....actually multiple times.
2. Have after school jobs by 4th grade (delivering papers), and then picking fruit in summer
3. Come home with leeches on their arm and saying, "Look at these sticky worms I found down by the creek."
4. Liberating construction debris to make a fort in the blackberry thicket.
5. Been given a semi-fatal heart attack by a startled pheasant.
5. As a lark, swam across the Willamette river in downtown Portland in 8th grade with Larry. ( he later became a boxer then singer)
6. Bicycled 40 miles (RT) to swim halfway across the Columbia a few weeks later.
7. Learned to climb Douglas Firs with a rope after watching lumberjack competitions. (once some mom called the cops on me and I had to climb down)
8. Found lots of porn when looking for cans and bottles in the trash cans at the 25 cent car wash.
9. Memorize the municipal bus schedules so I could get home on time from downtown.
10. Learned how to slide down the outside of a tree canopy without falling to their doom. (eventually...took a few tries)
11. Learned how to hide/retreat from threats until the time comes when you don't always have to.
12. Figured out how not starve and make at least three good dishes. (apple pie with homemade crust might me more important than anything else when it comes to securing a 2nd date)
13. Manners because you never know who you'll meet when out and about as a kid.
14. Oh, the bicycle....nearly destroying the skin on my knees and palms while figuring it out let me figure out so many things and lead to so many adventures and totally developed the love of not being sedentary.
PS
Am really glad I got to take fencing (dad) and wrestling (mom) at the folk's insistence that I don't watch too much TV (indoor activities at local high school aka 'community center' in summer).
1. Built a dam on the local creek....actually multiple times.
2. Have after school jobs by 4th grade (delivering papers), and then picking fruit in summer
3. Come home with leeches on their arm and saying, "Look at these sticky worms I found down by the creek."
4. Liberating construction debris to make a fort in the blackberry thicket.
5. Been given a semi-fatal heart attack by a startled pheasant.
5. As a lark, swam across the Willamette river in downtown Portland in 8th grade with Larry. ( he later became a boxer then singer)
6. Bicycled 40 miles (RT) to swim halfway across the Columbia a few weeks later.
7. Learned to climb Douglas Firs with a rope after watching lumberjack competitions. (once some mom called the cops on me and I had to climb down)
8. Found lots of porn when looking for cans and bottles in the trash cans at the 25 cent car wash.
9. Memorize the municipal bus schedules so I could get home on time from downtown.
10. Learned how to slide down the outside of a tree canopy without falling to their doom. (eventually...took a few tries)
11. Learned how to hide/retreat from threats until the time comes when you don't always have to.
12. Figured out how not starve and make at least three good dishes. (apple pie with homemade crust might me more important than anything else when it comes to securing a 2nd date)
13. Manners because you never know who you'll meet when out and about as a kid.
14. Oh, the bicycle....nearly destroying the skin on my knees and palms while figuring it out let me figure out so many things and lead to so many adventures and totally developed the love of not being sedentary.
PS
Am really glad I got to take fencing (dad) and wrestling (mom) at the folk's insistence that I don't watch too much TV (indoor activities at local high school aka 'community center' in summer).
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Love it, Doof.
Unstructured free play when I was a kid was what it was about. The one advantage I had that my kids don't was that there over 2 dozen other kids my age on my block alone - my kids have 0 others their age in the area. But they do have each other. We live right near a creek too that has a rope swing and I don't know, when i was a kid, I know my friends and I would have amused each other simply by throwing sh!t into the creek, would have occupied a good chunk of the day. Oh well. A good activity for them is to send the out the front door so I can tell them to get off my lawn.
This also seemed a good way to get the p*ss and vinegar out of the kids:
A) They should have more of this kind of stuff
B) $1,500 is kind of steep per week
1) Their liability insurance must be high
Unstructured free play when I was a kid was what it was about. The one advantage I had that my kids don't was that there over 2 dozen other kids my age on my block alone - my kids have 0 others their age in the area. But they do have each other. We live right near a creek too that has a rope swing and I don't know, when i was a kid, I know my friends and I would have amused each other simply by throwing sh!t into the creek, would have occupied a good chunk of the day. Oh well. A good activity for them is to send the out the front door so I can tell them to get off my lawn.
This also seemed a good way to get the p*ss and vinegar out of the kids:
CAMP SPARTAN 2022
Envision a military-style boot camp for kids ages 8-17 enduring five days (June 26-30th) of challenging work. They’ll be working with veterans from Mt. Warfare school, Olympic wrestlers, and Ivy League horticulturists. Guests include philosophy instructors, writers, and artists....
tickets-pk.spartan.com
A) They should have more of this kind of stuff
B) $1,500 is kind of steep per week
1) Their liability insurance must be high
I poasted this earlier and decided to delete it not knowing Bob's situation too well, but getting them outside to play with the neighborhood kids by themselves is ideal. It works in my neighborhood as well as it can with kids these days being on devices all the time (I don't give my kids any). Ideally, kids would organize their own sports. Mine play basketball leagues and now flag football, but it all started with them playing together in the street. My middle one also loves to play the piano. They can try different stuff and see what they like - the sport/activity chooses them more than the other way around. Driving your kids to and from stuff can turn into a nightmare and can make for entitled kids who don't know how to entertain themselves.
I don't see much value in kara-tay or BJJ. My kids did BJJ for a bit but I thought I was enrolling them in judo because I was tired of them breaking their arms wanted them to learn how to breakfall