Most young men are single. Most young women are not.

rowjimmytour

Tom Curren status
Feb 7, 2009
11,534
5,832
113
54
I love my wife and am happily monogamous, and as this point in my life have no interest in reproducing.

But yeah, if i were single, now that i am not fat, i would literally have my pick of highly attractive extremely successful women 10 years younger than me, just WAITING for a decent looking successful normal non-drunk-or-druggie of a man to appear and fill them full of high-performing DNA (other than the alcoholism gene of course- hopefully that would be bred out in the fictional universe i have just created)

That's kind of common in NYC. Young smart beautiful women DO focus on their careers in their 20's. Many of them go on to make wildy good money. But then yeah, 32 or 34 hits, and it's like "oh shoot, the music stopped, and i haven't found a breeding partner yet"

There are ALSO a ton of single women of average or below average appearance, and, despite sparkling personalities, just cannot figure out why they can't find a nice normal man who also looks like Brad Pitt. these chunky mediocre looking women think they should be waiting for Brad, that they DESERVE Brad. They're fools- they should be targeting their chunky, mediocre, but very kind and loving male counterparts. Those guys often make great husbands- they're just happy they actually got a girl

Men seem to have no problem accepting and falling in love with a woman more "matched" to whatever the man brings to the table. Women seem to think that it's Brad or nothing. Well, that leads to a LOT of single women in this region because the handsome successful men have already found their succesful hotty, and they are NOT settling for a chunky, plain-looking woman no matter how dazzling her personality. If she comes from massive generational wealth- this formula changes dramatically :)

Manage expectations people. I outkicked my coverage by a country mile when my wife fell in love with chubby drunken broke ass 27 year old subway. I knew it, and i loved her, and i f-ing married her before one of the countless handsome rich lotharios who populate the hamptons locked her up

And then i started making real money. And then i got sober. and then i lost 90 pounds. So, her risk on me paid off handsomely, but it was done with no guarantees whatsoever.
 

Subway

Administrator
Staff member
Dec 31, 2008
13,497
10,107
113
LBNY
My friends are all married and maybe 2 outta 8 seem happy after a few years...I've had meaningful relationships, but man, when I show up +1 to their weddings with a 27 year old bombshell they love it - their wives, not so much
Yeah I hear that. Most of our friends mostly seem happily married but meeeehhhhh not so sure. Some divorces, some we think are probably on borrowed time

My wife and I have discussed it at length. And like an Ent-Moot, we have decided we are in fact as happy with one another as we think we are. So that’s cool.

Sorry I rewatched the LOTR trilogy this weekend resting my ear canal

One more edit because my god was that the most married guy sentence or what
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Reactions: PRCD and wedge2

$kully

Duke status
Feb 27, 2009
60,006
16,710
113
"Young men “are watching a lot of social media, they’re watching a lot of porn, and I think they’re getting a lot of their needs met without having to go out. And I think that’s starting to be a habit.”


Thoughts?

Anecdotally, general pattern I see:

Men 20-35: watch a lot of porn (#1 problem), play a lot of video games, addicted to devices and online world = dopamine dysregulation>>>lack of drive?=women don't want them

Women 20-35: career focused and/or looking for higher value/competent males unlike the above thus greatly increasing the romantic opportunity for competent males (i.e. a handful of males are having their pick of all the women), and naturally seeking to marry up.

So men are the problem

Men 35+: More falling into the competent/high value category by this age, stuff working against them would be addictions, being fat, and negative personality traits are stronger

Women 35+: still looking to marry up. Tough luck at this point, most high value/competent males who want relationships are in a relationship or wifed. Women's standards (dictated by evolution) are now too high. Even harder in the single mom category.

And the dating apps amplify the effect.

In short all the females naturally want to mate with a small selection of competent males. But there aren't enough competent males to go around, so many women are ending up still single after 35?

-armchair psychologist, OUT!
You see a lot of patterns in young men don’t you? :monkey:
 

youcantbeserious

Billy Hamilton status
Oct 29, 2020
1,518
4,579
113
Location location
"Men 20-35: watch a lot of porn (#1 problem), play a lot of video games, addicted to devices and online world = dopamine dysregulation>>>lack of drive?=women don't want them."

I think mormon's have it all figured out. They're doing all of the above but are still getting married at 19-21. Maybe there is actually something to the book of mormon.
I grew up Mormon. They do not have it figured out.
 

CutnSnip

Phil Edwards status
Sep 11, 2018
5,736
6,044
113
Probably dropping in on you, California
I've been married for coming up on a quarter century and if my wife ever bailed, I would have no idea how to date.
its pretty fkn easy these days at least to meet a ton of woman - meeting quality women near my age is a different story.

i went out with a cute asian girl 2 weeks ago. Her profile said 41. She tells me during the date shes 47! I thought she looked 35 but i ended the date a few minutes later. She said if she put her real age we wouldnt have met - and im like yea youre right - my filter stops at 43. tough sh!t!
 

sizzld1

Phil Edwards status
Mar 31, 2009
7,330
1,264
113
Work friend here in LA is on the same program as a few who've commented. 40 years old, average looks but in shape, good career, decent level of self confidence, and no obvious red flags/obnoxious personality traits = endless stream of hot 20-somethings that most people would consider "out of his league" on the basis of looks alone. There are only two consistent problems he notes:

1) He really wants to settle down and start a family and finding a decent looking woman with something going for her (i.e. a career) who is also looking for something "real" is nearly impossible in his experience. He can get an endless stream of 20 year old instagram models, but never gets any interactions with good looking 30+ women with decent jobs; and

2) Relatedly, the endless stream of 20-something bimbos makes it very hard to focus on his goal of settling down and has given him a hairpin trigger when it comes to dealing with typical dating bs.
 

PRCD

Tom Curren status
Feb 25, 2020
12,513
8,546
113
Work friend here in LA is on the same program as a few who've commented. 40 years old, average looks but in shape, good career, decent level of self confidence, and no obvious red flags/obnoxious personality traits = endless stream of hot 20-somethings that most people would consider "out of his league" on the basis of looks alone. There are only two consistent problems he notes:

1) He really wants to settle down and start a family and finding a decent looking woman with something going for her (i.e. a career) who is also looking for something "real" is nearly impossible in his experience. He can get an endless stream of 20 year old instagram models, but never gets any interactions with good looking 30+ women with decent jobs; and

2) Relatedly, the endless stream of 20-something bimbos makes it very hard to focus on his goal of settling down and has given him a hairpin trigger when it comes to dealing with typical dating bs.
People in LA only love themselves. Has he tried marrying himself?