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Long distance relationships?
- Thread starter CutnSnip
- Start date
What seems to surprise them is how often those sorts of photos are shared around the water cooler.
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Prob not.
You need minimal contact at least a few days a week.
If she shows an emotional longing you need to appear somewhat indifferent but still demonstrate interest.
lolz
In that case might be worth it after all.
You're past 40, most of the options in your age group are pretty rotten.
heh, about 20 years ago, met a girl online playing backgammon...it started out light enough - daily chats, emails, phone etc - within a few weeks, i couldn't stop thinking about her. she was in Rio de Janiero, i was in Washington (state). somehow, we kept it going for a couple months until she came to visit over Thanksgiving. in person, everything clicked... I visited her in Brazil a few months later, shortly thereafter she transferred to her company's Miami office and I transferred to my company's SE NC office, so we kept it rolling, getting closer and closer. long story short, we worked our way into the same zip code gradually, within a year or two...bought a house, had a kid, made a life etc.Might've gotten myself into a little bit of trouble. Head over heels - 3,000 miles apart.
We just met a week ago - instant attraction on both parts. Have been texting/facetiming/zooming 24/7 since and Im not the type of guy that usually texting/glued to my phone all day type at all but I cant get enough.
Anyone have experience with this sort of thing? Did it work out, can it work out? Luckily communication technology has made this a bit easier these days but tips/ tricks to keep things interesting?
I know intimacy is the key to a long lasting relationship at least for me, but save the perv-y sh!t for another thread. Looking for advice on how to actually make this work sans both of us having to fly to one another every other weekend.
i think the key is that i was exactly the person i represented myself to be and so was she. so it can work, but it really requires two honest people to make it happen right. ymmv.
I tried the distance thing a few years ago. Met her when I was on a little surf trip up North. Hit it off. Hot, funny and a total sweetheart. We hung out a few days, went out to eat, hit the beach, etc.. She was hesitant to do the distance thing because of past experience. Distance wise it was a 4.5 hr drive, maybe more depending on traffic. We stayed in touch and eventually she was like hey I wanna come visit. Just as friends. Yeah, right.
After spending a weekend together we decided to try the long distance thing. It was good for a few months but eventually I think it just kind of wore us both out. Our work schedules didn't always work out to where we could do the drive. Lots of time on the phone and texting which isn't really my jam normally but it could be fun. Sort of bittersweet though after a long conversation and feeling connection then you hang up and go to bed alone. I ended up driving up more than her and sometimes it was exhausting after a long work week and it felt like the rest of my life was falling a bit out of balance. I'm so settled in where I live with property and family and friends, it was hard to imagine moving up the coast to a place that I frankly don't like nearly as much. Way more traffic and tourists and crowded surf. She loved it down here and looked for jobs but didn't find any. I looked at a couple houses up her way but ultimately it didn't matter.
Her mom got sick and she had to move back home to take care of her. I drove up to help her pack up her place and put it in storage, spend a couple final days together. It was pretty rough but I think there was a sense of relief as well. It felt like we were at a place where we either needed to move in together or call it quits and circumstance saved us from having to make that decision. I was willing to move up the coast but I wasn't about to move to the midwest. No regrets. We stayed in touch, her mom is doing well and she's living in CO now.
I hope it works out for you @CutnSnip. Dunno if I have any advice on the zoom front. She liked to snapchat and I felt silly but played along. If you are really into her just make the time and keep the connection going. It's a lot easier to let a relationship go when the person isn't physically there.
After spending a weekend together we decided to try the long distance thing. It was good for a few months but eventually I think it just kind of wore us both out. Our work schedules didn't always work out to where we could do the drive. Lots of time on the phone and texting which isn't really my jam normally but it could be fun. Sort of bittersweet though after a long conversation and feeling connection then you hang up and go to bed alone. I ended up driving up more than her and sometimes it was exhausting after a long work week and it felt like the rest of my life was falling a bit out of balance. I'm so settled in where I live with property and family and friends, it was hard to imagine moving up the coast to a place that I frankly don't like nearly as much. Way more traffic and tourists and crowded surf. She loved it down here and looked for jobs but didn't find any. I looked at a couple houses up her way but ultimately it didn't matter.
Her mom got sick and she had to move back home to take care of her. I drove up to help her pack up her place and put it in storage, spend a couple final days together. It was pretty rough but I think there was a sense of relief as well. It felt like we were at a place where we either needed to move in together or call it quits and circumstance saved us from having to make that decision. I was willing to move up the coast but I wasn't about to move to the midwest. No regrets. We stayed in touch, her mom is doing well and she's living in CO now.
I hope it works out for you @CutnSnip. Dunno if I have any advice on the zoom front. She liked to snapchat and I felt silly but played along. If you are really into her just make the time and keep the connection going. It's a lot easier to let a relationship go when the person isn't physically there.
In 2010 I met a girl 4 months before moving away for the military. I was going to training where I would have limited contact for 3 months. Then we lived across the country from each other for another 20 months.
11 years, 4 moves, and 2 kids later and we are happily married. Good luck
11 years, 4 moves, and 2 kids later and we are happily married. Good luck
can;t help you with handling long distance but something to consider:
When she comes out here do what you normally do. hang out with friends, go where you normally go (aside from dinner dates maybe) and when you go to her place try to get engrained in her normal lifestyle and see what that's all about.
everything is peachy when you fall in love but once the everyday life kicks in that's when it gets real.
If this random piece of advice somewhat helps in the future I'd like for you to tell her that some of your decision to marry her came from a completely random dude named Silentbutdeadly on the internet
When she comes out here do what you normally do. hang out with friends, go where you normally go (aside from dinner dates maybe) and when you go to her place try to get engrained in her normal lifestyle and see what that's all about.
everything is peachy when you fall in love but once the everyday life kicks in that's when it gets real.
If this random piece of advice somewhat helps in the future I'd like for you to tell her that some of your decision to marry her came from a completely random dude named Silentbutdeadly on the internet
You paid for her flight ? she is younger? 10 years younger?more ? I predict you are going to have a great time and then get your heart broke. Enjoy the ride
in all seriousness good luck! keep us posted
stocked to hear a success story!
this is exactly what attracted both of us to one another. i mean she is drop dead gorgeous, funny, confident and has a moxie ive never encountered but i went into this trip with one thing in mind getting fucked up w/ friends. we met each other in our most vulnerable states on several forms of truth serums and it all just clicked and continues to click.
yes, yes, and yes.You paid for her flight ? she is younger? 10 years younger?more ? I predict you are going to have a great time and then get your heart broke. Enjoy the ride
in all seriousness good luck! keep us posted
we've both acknowledged its going to either be a complete disaster or a miracle and nothing in between.
man, thats some real sh!t right there and i didnt think about that. ive been trying to plan out some special stuff but if a person isnt into the your day to day then whats the point right.can;t help you with handling long distance but something to consider:
When she comes out here do what you normally do. hang out with friends, go where you normally go (aside from dinner dates maybe) and when you go to her place try to get engrained in her normal lifestyle and see what that's all about.
everything is peachy when you fall in love but once the everyday life kicks in that's when it gets real.
If this random piece of advice somewhat helps in the future I'd like for you to tell her that some of your decision to marry her came from a completely random dude named Silentbutdeadly on the internet
She’s getting gorilla fuckked by her boyfriend(s) 3,000 miles away.
Nothing wrong with being a pen pal but don’t kid yourself.
Nothing wrong with being a pen pal but don’t kid yourself.
My girl would come down for the weekend and we would F 12 times in a 3 day period and then she would be back home and her pussy would hurt and I would give her some kind of pussy infection. 
having an end date to long distance from early on is most key, in my experience. The sooner, the better.
Oh it’s a gonna be a disaster and when it happens it will be on her terms.
that’s how it always ends for older guys with younger women that they are way into.
At least for me it does hahahaha