Empathy sucks

[casa_mugrienta]

LOW EMPATH!

 

[Woke AF]

Gotcha, do You work w autistic kids?

My perspective is - like you are saying - they are extraordinarily overwhelmed. from the outside it looks like their feelings and sensory input must feel like a fire hose full throttle, point blank at them, so they’re always in survival mode. That has to be so exhausting and taxing, so something like compassion gets out to the bottom of the list.

The very high functioning spectrum folks I know - some are very successful and live pretty “normal” lives even though they operate a lil differently. I’ve known kids that were thought to have had some type of “attention deficit disorder“ put on meds for that - only making things worse. Then getting a proper eval and found to be on the spectrum and then more or less thriving w some modifications at school, parents being supportive in crucial ways and the kids working “smart“ and fckn hard.

Occasionally I get an autistic student. The last one used to get very angry when he was frustrated. Trying to stab me with his pencil was his go-to move. My hands were his main target until I used some empathy to tell when he was reaching his frustration limit. That's when I could prepare for his jab at my hand. Took me a while but got good at it. That pissed him off more, so he changed his target to my eyes. Luckily I was wearing glasses the first time he did it.

I agree, if they do experience the need to act with compassion it is not near the top of the list.

 

[Ifallalot]

LOW EMPATH!

Better memorize those breakfast cereals

 

[Ifallalot]

Occasionally I get an autistic student. The last one used to get very angry when he was frustrated. Trying to stab me with his pencil was his go-to move. My hands were his main target until I used some empathy to tell when he was reaching his frustration limit. That's when I could prepare for his jab at my hand. Took me a while but got good at it. That pissed him off more, so he changed his target to my eyes. Luckily I was wearing glasses the first time he did it.

I agree, if they do experience the need to act with compassion it is not near the top of the list.

You should have bought him an old-school compass

 

[Sharky]

Are you sure he's autistic?

I mean, you are kind of stab-able...

 

[Woke AF]

Are you sure he's autistic?

I mean, you are kind of stab-able...

I guess you guys should start forming a line but...I feel for you Bro

edit*
All the Low Empaths please form up behind sharky and hands to yourselves!

 

[2surf]

An old man of ninety was sitting on a park bench crying. A policeman noticed this and asked him why he was crying.
"Well," says the old fellow, "I just got married to a twenty-five year old woman. Every morning she makes me a wonderful breakfast, and we have then have fun together laughing and relaxing. In the afternoon she makes me a wonderful lunch and then we make fun together laughing and relaxing again. At dinner time she makes me a wonderful supper and then we relax more and enjoy ourselves."
The policeman looks at the old man and says, "You shouldn't be crying! You should be the happiest man in the world!"
"I know!" says the old man, "I'm crying because I don't remember where I live!"

 

[estreet]

I'm ultra cynical.

Yes, the following pretty much confirms that. All maladaptive emotional responses, it should be noted, are best regulated with reason and not other emotion nonsense.

But maybe you have a reasonable explanation of how the following works? How exactly does empathy make people angry, for instance? Is it like a domino effect where an empathetic person feels the anger of someone and then another empathetic person feels their anger, and so on?

Have you taken a look at your teammates here?

The "no tolerance for intolerance" crowd?

In my experience it is empathy that makes people angry - they begin to bear the weight of the world on their shoulders and see injustice everywhere.

That's exhausting.

I can't imagine living like that.

 

[plasticbertrand]

This is so classic.

 

[plasticbertrand]

"Hyper-empathy syndrome
Hyper-empathy syndrome occurs when you are too in tune with other people’s emotions and mirror them to the same intensity. In other words, you care too much. People with hyper-empathy may find it hard to regulate their emotions and may have a tendency to pick up on negative feelings.

The symptoms of hyper-empathy include:

• You have strong emotional reactions when other people experience negative feelings. Sometimes, these reactions are
• intense even if you’re only looking at a photo or a movie and may include physical symptoms (stomach ache, nausea).
• 
  
• You still feel an emotional response to another person’s pain a few days after it happened.
• 
  
• You feel overwhelmed after talking to people about their problems because it’s as if they’re happening to you.
• 
  
• You’re so focused on other people’s problems you neglect taking care of yourself.
• 
  
• You find it hard to say no to people because you feel sorry for them.

People with hyper-empathy are often labelled as overly sensitive, and, to a certain extent, being more in tune with people’s emotions can help you build meaningful connections. However, left unmanaged, hyper-empathy can be harmful to your mental health because it can make you pursue co-dependent relationships, have poor personal boundaries, and neglect your own needs.

Hyper-empathy can also be a symptom of borderline personality disorder (BPD), which is why it’s important to talk about it with a professional and find a healthy way of regulating your emotions."

So now we are talking about a mental disorder?



What happened to the run of the mill, regular empathy?

 

[plasticbertrand]

Does anybody find it strange that the three posters who are most vehemently trying to prove that empathy is cancer, are also the ones who display narcissistic traits here daily?

Coincidence?

 

[Mr Doof]

This doesn't surprise me in the least....I mean, who among us hasn't had to deal with that one friend/acquaintance that has become such an energy suck you more or less have to remove them from your life (either partially or completely). Looking at you, junkie friend, who stole from everyone who ever loved you, and alcoholic friends that thrashed their marriage/job/life and our friendship. Self preservation = kicking some to the curb.

Too much of anything is not a good thing.

 

[enframed]

As Autoprax is fond of saying: The poison is the dose. That video doesn't say empathy is bad. It says is can be bad, unregulated.

 

[Aruka]

View attachment 135470

This doesn't surprise me in the least....I mean, who among us hasn't had to deal with that one friend/acquaintance that has become such an energy suck you more or less have to remove them from your life (either partially or completely). Looking at you, junkie friend, who stole from everyone who ever loved you.

Too much of anything is not a good thing.

NO. ALL EMDPATHY BAD.

 

[plasticbertrand]

NO. ALL EMDPATHY BAD.

Narcissism is cancer.

 

[Sharky]

View attachment 135470

This doesn't surprise me in the least....I mean, who among us hasn't had to deal with that one friend/acquaintance that has become such an energy suck you more or less have to remove them from your life (either partially or completely). Looking at you, junkie friend, who stole from everyone who ever loved you, and alcoholic friends that thrashed their marriage/job/life and our friendship.

Too much of anything is not a good thing.

This. There's an obvious balance between hyper-empathy syndrome and sociopathy.

 

[plasticbertrand]

As Autoprax is fond of saying: The poison is the dose. That video doesn't say empathy is bad. It says is can be bad, unregulated.

I haven't watched the video but that sounds like borderline disorder.

That's nothing to do with normal human empathy.

 

[Sharky]

So now we are talking about a mental disorder?



What happened to the run of the mill, regular empathy?

If you would like to argue with the mental health professionals responsible for that quote, feel free.

The Minds Journal – Your Guide To Better Mental Health and Relationships - The Minds Journal

Or you can look at other sources.

Hyper Empathy Syndrome: Are You Extremely Sensitive To The Emotions And Energy Of Other People? | Emotional & Stress Management articles | Emotional & Mental Health center | SteadyHealth.com

Hyper Empathy | Characteristics and Treatment | CogniFit (yourbrain.health)

▷ Hyper-Empathy Syndrome: When the pain of the others overcomes you (psychology-spot.com)

Hyper-Empathy Syndrome: Too Much of a Good Thing - Exploring your mind

On and on. It's not like I'm making it up.

Personally I have observed people who were overly empathetic/sensitive who started self medicating to numb the stress/pain. They do that long enough and they become sociopaths who care about nothing but their next high.

Balance is hard sometimes.

 

[plasticbertrand]

If you would like to argue with the mental health professionals responsible for that quote, feel free.

The Minds Journal – Your Guide To Better Mental Health and Relationships - The Minds Journal

I'm not arguing that borderline disorder is not a thing.

What I don't understand is why bring up a mental disorder in a discussion about empathy?

Too much of anything is bad.

Empathy is not, however, cancer.

 

[Random Guy]

I feel for Empathetic people
they care so much
and People call the sociopaths
its So worrisome